Thursday, 4 February 2010

Respect the bubble!


Some people have big ones, some don't mind small ones. Some cater theirs according to the people they meet and interact with. Some even have layers in theirs, for categories of people in their life – acquaintance, friends, BFFs, relatives, families, colleagues, strangers and aliens. Yet in some people, and certain cultures, the concept doesn't even exist. Bare all. Hey, it's a boundary-less world they say.


I am talking about a personal bubble, or a personal space or comfort zone, that invisible barrier you create around yourself, reserved for your own intimate feelings, for people you hold close to your heart, and for those you trust completely. Different people reserve different feelings and emotions in their personal bubbles. People from highly individualistic culture/community (like the Americans, New Zealanders, Canadians), the diameters of their personal bubbles are longer than those of the people from highly communal societies (like MALAYSIA, India, Bangladesh). Generally speaking. There are exceptions in all societies. Because of evolution, education, upbringing, and just personal preference, certain people who hail from highly communal societies can possess shrinking personal bubbles, and vice versa.


Merely from my own observation, I think my personal bubble is larger and possibly thicker (to barricade those hard-core social invaders) than most of my peers from the same culture and country. Only selected few people are allowed inside my personal bubble. And because I am one of those people who put other people who have crossed my life journey into boxes, or categories, I have layers of personal bubble for different people who belong in different boxes. Just because I know you, doesn't mean you're my FRIEND. Just because we are related, doesn't mean you're my family. Just because I am from Malaysia like you are, doesn't mean you can judge me and assume that we are alike. My personal bubble doesn't recognize race, religion, age or gender. Sincerity carries greater value.


To those who are allowed into my personal bubble, thank you for your friendship, trust and sincerity. To those who aren't, I'm sure you belong in one of many of your friends' or family members'. Just because you don't belong inside mine, doesn't mean you're a bad person, just means we value different things in life, and I respect you for that. And to those hard-core social invaders, who don't respect others' personal space, just because I invited you to my house, doesn't automatically privileged you of the bananas in my fruit basket. You're cluttering my mind, and my personal bubble is too small for your fat ass!

7 comments:

just me said...

Uh! very deep in meaning indeed. i shall evaluate myself n know which box is more likely fit for me. but, yeah, sounds a bit harsh (sori have to be frank) but, there's TRUTH in your words indeed n based on my experience, i couldn't agree more.

Zaidah M said...

Mie, thanks for your comments. The last part of the writeup was for a certain someone who has invaded my personal bubble just recently.

just me said...

i think i just have the same problem too. i like the last part actually, coz someone here feel so free to come into my house buka tudung saji, belek my food stocks i bring from malaysia etc. how inconvenient me.
now, somehow, she keeps distance n i guess she knows my 'bubble' doesn't include her for some personal reasons. thanks for the thought, very beauiful n mind-provoking indeed

Ermayum said...

zaidah dearrrrrrrrr
wow dah jadi dr ye awak DR Zaidah - wow that is great :)
hmm so long have not seen you
which bubble i fall into? heheh

Zaidah M said...

EDA! I miss you. Thanks for your interest in my blog :) You belong in the FRIENDS bubble. Consider it a huge privilege :)

dahliaz said...

Hi there my friend. Nice piece on the bubbles. Just one question. What happen when a certain someone that we like to put in our personal bubble, refuse?

Zaidah M said...

To Bunge. Glad you're dropping by! I say too bad for the person. His/her loss indeed. When a person refuses to be inside our personal bubble, then he/she is better off outside!